Reflux: A Living Nightmare!

It's hard for me to talk about this topic without using any naughty words; it brings back memories of one of the most difficult times of my life as a parent! Almost twenty four hours of relentless screaming day in and day out! Feeling helpless as there is practically nothing you can do to comfort your child! No sleep! No rest! No way of knowing when it will end! A living nightmare!!!

I am talking about Reflux or Gastro-oesophagea Reflux Disease, which is it posh name. My little Lottie was diagnosed with Reflux at just a few weeks old; as you may already have gathered  it was by far the hardest parenting challenge that hubbie and I have ever had to face. When a child suffers from Reflux, everyone suffers!

This week is national "Living with Reflux Week", so I decided that it was a fitting time to share my personal experience.

I was unaware of what Reflux was before Lottie was diagnosed; I had previously had Ruby, who when looking back was a dream baby; she would self settle and nap when she needed to. It was a whole different experience when Lottie came along, who not through any fault of her own began to suffer from this horrible condition at just six weeks old.

When a baby or child has Reflux, they are prone to bringing up a mixture of food, drink and stomach acid, burning the food pipe and throat in the process and making them extremely painful; this mixture can even make it's way into the windpipe to irritate the lungs and potentially cause severe chest infections.

We had numerous trips to the Children's Ward at the Leicester Royal Infirmary during these difficult times where doctors tried all sorts of medicines in an attempt to combat the Reflux. We found that Lottie was worse when she was lying down, she wouldn't even settle when she was being held. I could actually hear the acid coming up and burning the back of her throat, my poor little Lottie, I felt so helpless!

I remember one Thursday shortly after Lottie was born, hubbie had gone back to work and I was on my own at home with the girls; the previous day Lottie had been unsettled but I did not think anything of it; this Thursday was like no other, Lottie was so unsettled, nothing I did would stop her crying, she was literally screaming all the time. I don't think people actually believed me when I said there was no let up. People thought that I was making it up, but it was sheer torture. I rang Phil at work crying, I told him what was up and that something must be wrong; my Mummy instinct was kicking in; I told him I didn't feel like I could cope and thankfully he came from work.

Tiny Lottie and Mummy

Phil tried to settle Lottie but couldn't stop her crying; we decided on a trip to the doctors and they prescribed Infant Gaviscon but unfortunately this seemed to have no effect. One evening we went to A and E and were admitted to the ward; thankfully the doctors were a lot more understanding and diagnosed it as Reflux. You would think that this was the end to the story but it wasn't! It was a long fight to get the right medication and a lot of experimentation to get the right dosage. I lost count of how many times I saw various GPs at our practice; one very unhelpful doctor who I will never see again, told me that if Lottie will settle in her car seat I should drive her around for naps and leave her in the car seat all day! She really put my back up; no way was I doing that! Firstly, babies are not supposed to sleep in their car seats or be in them for any longer than 2 hours and secondly, how much it was going to cost me in fuel and time driving around? I knew I had a fight on my hands and it was up to me to get the treatment needed to make my daughter better. Fortunately I found an amazing GP within my practice, I told her what the other GP had said andshe was really angry with her colleague. I cried to her and told her everything; fortunately for us she was prepared to do anything to get Lottie's Reflux under control; she even kept in touch with me every other day for progress updates and to help me tweak the medication doses.

At some points I didn't even want to leave the house as I was afraid of what people would say as she just screamed constantly; I had people come to visit who initially thought I was exaggerating; they soon realised that I wasn't when they witnessed first hand how bad the constant screaming and crying was.

We tried everything; at one point the doctors thought that it might have been flared up by a dairy intolerance, so as I was breast feeding her. I had to go a week without diary; this was really hard considering I hardly eat any meat and rely on dairy as my main source of protein.

I did a lot of research after Lottie was diagnosed and found that one of the best things that helped her was wearing her in a carrier; we started off with a close carrier and now have a woven wrap which I love to this day. We also bought a rocking swing which has been the best thing that we have ever bought from eBay at a bargain price of just £10.50.

Our woven wrap that we love.

Thankfully Lottie's Reflux days are behind us now. I don't think anyone can really understand how bad it is to have a Reflux baby unless they have personally had one or witnessed someone who has. The best advice I can give to any parent is to trust your instinct, if something doesn't feel right with your child, it probably isn't. It is also important to fight for the right medication for your child and do not take no for an answer.

If you need any further help or advice on Reflux then feel free to get in touch; you can also visit one of the following sites for more information - http://www.livingwithreflux.org/ or http://www.littlerefluxers.co.uk/

Family Thursday and a Fantastic Local Find!

Thursdays are normally spent at home, however today my hubbie took a day off work; we had nothing planned so we decided to venture out on the hunt for some new art and craft supplies for Ruby. A friend had pointed me in the direction of a place a few miles from our home and Ruby was very excited to be going to the art and craft shop!

When we arrived at the 'pre-school learning alliance resource centre', we were greeted by a lovely lady who welcomed us and explained that they were a charity  and their mission was to help children to succeed, help to create the childcare that families need and build learning communities. For just £5 a year you get access to shop as many times a year as you like; you can even hire soft play and outdoor equipment for a small fee; i'm sure we will be taking up this offer for the girls birthday parties! We didn't mind paying the £5 membership as it needed to support the upkeep of the charity since the funding was been cut.

Inside the shop there is an enclosed play area for the children to enjoy whilst you look at all the many items that are available to purchase; there is also a second hand part of the shop where they sell used toys, clothes and books. They also provides tea, coffee and refreshments too!

I absolutely loved this place and I wish I had known about it before; I would highly recommend it!

These shops exist all over the country; here is the link to the Leicester one that we went to - https://www.pre-school.org.uk/leicester-city-leicestershire/resource-centre-shop. It definitely is worth seeing if there is one local to you.

We stocked up on lots of art and craft supplies and only spent £15! It was so much cheaper and better quality than any other shop we have been to.

On the way back from the shops we went to Knighton Park; I remember going as a child and having lots of fun. The park has recently been done up and is so nice for children of all ages; there is a play area for little ones and a separate area for older children. They even had an outdoor gym which hubbie used!

Ruby had so much fun on the swings, climbing frame and even the train!

Lottie on the other hand just enjoyed the fresh air!

After a lot of play we decided to grab a bite to eat at Waitrose. Ruby said she was starving and had a special star treat! We then picked up a little bit of food shopping before heading home for the afternoon.

Ruby's treat, I wish I had been allowed one! 

Ruby has been so excited and has had a great time this afternoon using some of her new art and craft bits to make a crown; I even had the time whilst she was busy to cut out the pattern for my new lounge cushions!

Today has been one of those days where its just been so perfect; a really lovely family day!

Is it better to keep quiet?

I am sure there is not a single person that hasn't heard the terrible and shocking news about what happened in Boston, America on Monday evening. For anyone who has not; two bombs went off close to the finishing line of the Boston marathon and at present three people have sadly lost their life's and many other people are very badly injured.

Cute and Innocent

I would firstly like to say that my thoughts and prayers are very much with all the people injured or bereaved; I cannot come close to understanding how they must be feeling.

On Monday evening we were just putting Ruby to bed when the breaking news came in reporting this tragedy and after Ruby was asleep hubbie and I were glued to the news. We were both so stunned, so shocked that someone would intentionally want to plant bombs with the aim of killing people or completely turning a persons life upside down. I don't understand it, or get it, Why?

It is unfortunate that the world we live in today is not all nice and lovely there is constantly something horrible happening; this got me thinking about today's blog post, should we as parents censor what our children see? or should we tell them about the news?

For me as a mother I would love to wrap Ruby and Lottie up in cotton wool and protect both of them from the outside world, but I also know deep down that whatever I do I can't fully stop them from watching or hearing something; I feel that if I were to do this, the girls will have a massive shock to their systems when they are older. Bad things should not be happening but they do occur far too often. Personally I feel my girls need to know in a basic way about what is going on and why; they do not need to know all the graphic details but they need to know something.

I decided over breakfast on Tuesday to take the time to talk to Ruby about the bombs in America, I told her that someone had put some bombs in a street and they made a big bang and created a fire, and that lots of people got hurt, but doctors and nurses were doing all they could to make people better. Ruby took all this on board and I showed her some of the photos on the BBC news website, I had already looked at them to check they were what I would deem to be suitable and acceptable for her to see. After looking at the pictures and having me explaining them to her, she said to me "mummy, we need to ask Jesus to make them better"; I told her that was a lovely idea so Ruby and I said a very basic and short prayer together.

We then headed off to playschool and as I was hanging up Ruby's coat and bag she walked over to the playschool leader and told her "I need to tell you something, there has been a big fire and lots of people have been hurt but the doctors and nurses are trying to make them better" The leader looked at her and agreed and Ruby says "lets pray" so she did. The leader at playschool attends a church and is amazed that even at 3 years old how Ruby grasps the news.

Do I think that I have done the right thing in telling Ruby about the bombing? Yes I certainly do; I can not keep her wrapped up in cotton wool, she might one day turn the TV on or watch the news with me and be alarmed after never seeing it before; so should we never have the TV on when the girls are around? Do I not take her to the local shop to get some treats in case she looks at a newspaper? No I will not.

Today was the funeral of Margaret Thatcher and if Ruby had not at playschool I would have had the TV and watched part of it with her. She is already aware of death as recently a neighbour passed away and by the families request, I took the girls to the funeral. If I am honest I was unsure about taking Ruby and Lottie in case they misbehaved or were too noisy, however I didn't have anyone to look after the girls so I decided we would go and sit near to the back of church and if the girls became restless we would leave. I had spoken with hubbie and a few other people to get their advice and had decided that it would be best to tell Ruby what was going to happen and why. I explained that we were going to a funeral, there would be a box and a lady was in it, however her soul was in heaven but her body was dead. I was really scared if I did not tell her anything that in the quiet of the funeral service she might come out with "whats in that box mummy?". Both girls exceeded my expectations and behaved so well; afterwards we went to the wake for some cake and tea and everyone commented on how well behaved they were, I felt like a very very proud mummy. The following day we visited my mother and Ruby told her about the funeral and there was a lady in the box but she did not see her! Ruby then went off and played with her toys and put her favorite pink bunny into a box; I asked her what she was doing and told me she was having a funeral and that I needed to stand near the box and sing a song! For pink bunnies funeral we had to sing twinkle twinkle little star! I find it amazing how much Ruby takes it, it is very sweet to see.

I really wish bad things would not happen, but they do and unfortunately its a part of life; all we can hope, dream and pray is that one day things won't be as bad for our children. I believe our children need to be aware that this world is not as perfect as we would hope it would be.

Tuff Times, In More Ways Than One!

Ruby has been unwell over the last few days: it never usually seems to bother her when she is poorly, but this time was different; shes been plagued by a sickness bug that has been doing the rounds at playschool; I think it was only a matter of time until she got it. This was the first time that Ruby has ever been aware of being sick and as a mother it has been heart wrenching; all I want to do is make her better. Anybody who knows Ruby will be aware that she loves food; she went totally off it, not even her favorite jam on toast could entice her to eat! Ruby was so tired and looked so sad that I decided that a special treat was in order! I went off to my local DIY store and purchased a Tuff Tray (also known as a cement mixing tray). Nothing special about a cement tray and certainly not a treat you may think? Well I can tell you that this tray has already been used to have so much fun and in the process bring out lots of smiles and laughter.

There are so many different things that you can do with a Tuff Tray; you will be able to follow our adventures over the coming weeks and months. Messy play is very new to Ruby and I, we didn't do any when she was younger; I think I was too scared of the mess. At playschool, Ruby rarely used to paint or draw, instead favoring the home corner or dressing up! This all changed about a month ago when I decided to chill out more as a mum and jump into the world of messy play. As you will have already seen on the blog we have been using more paint and pens in our play times.

Yesterday we did some marble painting in the tray; I filled up pots with paint and then gave Ruby some marbles; she enjoyed counting them out and putting them into the paint. Ruby then swirled the paint onto the marbles before rolling them onto the paper. Lottie watched on whilst being sat outside of the tray; I think she really wanted to be in on the action as she kept reaching forward and grabbing the newspaper! After all the marbles were on the paper, I got Ruby to place them back in the right coloured paint pots; I cant wait to do this with Lottie as it will help her to learn to count and know her colours too.

I decided that it didn't matter if the girls got wet as it was near their bath time and they were due to have a bath. Next to go into the tray was some water and Duplo animals; I explained to Ruby and Lottie that as it was soon their bath time and the animals needed a wash themselves. I showed Lottie how to put the animals in the water, but she was far more interested in eating them! Ruby on the other hand knew what to do straight away and even invented her own little story and used the sharks to try and eat Lottie and I! After a while I suggested that Ruby might like to get into the tray; initially she was very unsure and then a few minutes later she went away and came back with her swimming costume! I put the swimming costume on her and she loved it, I struggled to get her out of it and she ended up being an hour late to bed!

Thankfully Ruby is back to her normal happy self and today returned back to playschool which she absolutely loves.

As you may have read in one of my previous posts, we had applied for Ruby to start school this coming September; well I am incredibly relieved that today we found out Ruby has a place in the school that we put as her first choice! I feel a massive weight has been lifted as I was a bit worried because the school is not in our catchment area and it is in demand as it was recently rated as outstanding by Ofsted. It does however mean that we are going to have to use the car as the school is not within walking distance, but I know that I am doing what is best for Ruby and giving her the best possible start I can.